I know some of you are thinking about it, so I'll get right to the point. I would like this:

Very Nice Shirt

For Christmas/Channika/Bodhi Tree Day/Solstice/Yule/Blasphemous Commodity Day/Atheist Drinking Binge Pub Crawl/Kwanza. Don't care which, don't care what I spelled wrong. Want shirt. Size large please, Halloween was slow so...chocolate bars had to go somewhere. I'm pretty sure they go bad if left unattended. Science.